The Florida Bar

Florida Bar Journal

‘Twas the Week Before Christmas


‘Twas the week before Christmas and all through the place, all attorneys were billing at an ungodly pace.

Their files were stacked high on their desks with such care, in hopes that their quotas would soon be met there.

They read and they pled and they talked and they spewed; they dictated, pontificated, regurgitated and construed.

Point six for a phone call, point two for a thought, point eight for a letter, whether one page or not.

Bill higher, bill faster, bill quicker, bill more! Bill seconds, bill minutes — but who’s keeping score?

They barked out to secretaries and said with such style, “I must bill the heck out of every last file!”

“I won’t be a goat” they were heard to proclaim — “I’ll make history here! I’ll have money and fame!”

Work hard, but be happy.

Have balance, my friends!

Merry Christmas, happy holidays!

The end.